I told my husband, Peter, that our marriage was like stew—and that’s a good thing.
This is a second marriage for both Peter and me. We were both married for a long time and then divorced for quite a while. We dated other people and realized how tricky the whole process of finding a new partner was, after habits had been set and preferences settled.
When I met Peter, I was ready… I think. I had healed and spent time on my own and figured out who I was—single and over fifty and changed in many ways from the person I had been while married.
Peter had also done his homework. He was perfectly self-sufficient in every respect. He just wanted love. As it happens, this is something I had a good supply of. And so, we started dating and Peter asked me to marry him after only two months. We waited a year and got married on the one-year anniversary of our first date.
“I like stew,” Peter said, when I told him what I thought.
“It’s better than soup,” Peter continued. “But I like mine all mashed up with a food processor, and you don’t,” he added.
“You are ruining my metaphor,” I told him. Peter has a way of doing this.
Because I work at home and Peter is retired, we spend a lot of time together. Perhaps because of this, we actually do a lot of things separately that you might imagine we’d do together. Peter exercises in the morning. I exercise in the evening. Peter eats his main meal in the middle of the day and cooks it for himself. I cook my own meal and eat it in the evening. Peter spends most of his day downstairs while I am upstairs in my “writing room,” which is not actually a room, as it has no door and is open to the rest of the house. I like this. I can keep track of what Peter’s up to and holler things at him.
“I can’t hear you!” Peter hollers back. I know he can’t hear me—but I do it anyway. I’m convinced he enjoys knowing that I’m thinking about him.
Maybe our marriage is peculiar; I am in no position to say. Maybe every marriage is peculiar in its own way. My parents, who have now been married more than sixty years, have arguments in which they are in perfect agreement. My mother will state her case, then my father will state his. There will be some made-up antagonist hovering in the background, arguing against both of them. My parents invariably win these arguments and I am sure they feel satisfied with themselves when they vanquish their imaginary opponent. It’s a terrific strategy—it lets them vent a little of the frustration they would never consider taking out on one another.
I think a happy marriage is like stew because it starts out with good ingredients gets richer and more satisfying with time. It is full of lots of healthy things: humor and understanding and a profound desire to see each other happy. Peter and I both understand that our moods are our own but comfort one another when things aren’t going the way we’d like—when Peter’s knee is acting up again, when my writing doesn’t go as well as I’d like.
“Yeah, stew is much better once you’ve taken a food processor to it,” Peter insisted. “And it’s easier to digest!”
I had no idea what to do with that metaphor—so I let it simmer.
Till next time,
They say that blessings come in disguise. If so, my blessings are poorly disguised. They show up wearing false noses and funny eyeglasses and are instantly recognizable unless I am being completely thick-headed—and it is astonishing how often I am. I had... [More]
I was not popular in high school. Everyone says this. I now realize that no one—not even the most popular person in high school—self-identifies as popular. Lately I’ve been getting a lot of Facebook friend requests from people I scarcely knew... [More]
I spent the last couple weeks visiting my parents. I’ve been lucky in the parent department. It’s fashionable to recall some pivotal incident that occurred when we were eight and extrapolate how every difficulty experienced in our life since is a result. But... [More]
She wore it for one day in 1919 and it looked as if it was sewn with this in mind. My grandma’s wedding dress was more than a little worse for wear. It had been folded up in a small box and kept safe by my cousin, Jill. (How Jill ended up with it, I do not know.)... [More]
The surprises just kept coming. When I moved in with Peter a few years back, I brought my clothes, a few books, and some artwork. I rented out my house, gave away my furniture, and everything else was consigned to “things I’ll deal with later,” a pile... [More]
Nobody was using the old wren house. My grandfather built it. Grandpa started building birdhouses when he retired from milking cows and his second oldest son took over. That son, my mother’s brother, is now 87 and retired 20 years ago. It’s a pretty old birdhouse. ... [More]
I’ve been having my husband, Peter, cut my hair. I’m not sure I would recommend this to everyone, but I have almost no hair. Actually, I have the usual number of hairs, but they are so fine that a hair that falls from my head into the sink is invisible to the naked... [More]
It was my birthday this week. Those of you with summer birthdays know it’s a little different. In the middle of March, everyone says, “Wow! A birthday party!” You bring treats to school and everyone is happy for an excuse to celebrate. It’s... [More]
On May 15th, Vance Diamond Halsey appeared in the Wallace County District Court with court appointed attorney, Christopher Rohr, Colby for sentencing in the matter of case 2019-CR-03. Halsey was charged with Fleeing or Attempting to Elude a Police Officer on March 12, 2019, ... [More]
May Traffic Report Thomas, Dyami R, Bellingham, Wash, driving 85 mph in a 65 mph zone, fines $105, court cost $108. Araujo Pompa, Almedio, Coral Gables, Fla, driving 85 mph in a 65 mph zone, fines $105, court cost $108. Lennon, Jake Owen, Pittsburg, Penn, driving 93 mph... [More]
James Manuel Phillips, Gardner, Colo, driving 77 mph in a 65 mph zone, fines $57 and court costs $108. Kenzie Marie Spreier, Colby, Kans, diving 80 in a 65 mph zone, fines $75 and court costs $108. Erick Edward Jarosz, Canon City, Colo, driving 84 mph in a 65 mph zone,... [More]
Jonathan Brandon appeared in Wallace County District Court on April 10th, 2019, with his court appointed attorney, Steve Cott, Garden City, for sentencing in cases 17 CR 51 and 17 CR 58. Each case charged Brandon with Distribution of Methamphetamine within 1000 feet of a school,... [More]
Chandler, Garrett Scott, Pueblo, Colo, driving 75 mph in a 65 mph zone, fines $69, court costs $108. Palmier, Joshua Quayshun, Birmingham, Ala, driving 84 mph in a 65 mph zone, fines $99, court costs $108. Chavez, Brenda Icilice, Denver, Colo, driving 85 mph in a 65 mph zone,... [More]
On March 13th, 2019 Charlene Valdez appeared in Wallace County District Court with court appointed attorney Leslie Beims, Goodland in the matter of case number 2017 CR 42. Valdez had been charged with Conspiracy to Distribute Methamphetamine, within 1,000’ of a school,... [More]
Chandler, Garrett Scott, of Pueblo, Colo, cited for driving 79 mph in a 65-mph zone, ordered to pay $65 in fines and $108 in court costs. Palmier, Joshua Quayshun, of Birmingham, Ala, cited for driving 84 mph in a 65-mph zone, ordered to pay $99 in fines and $108 in court... [More]
Destrie Whitaker appeared in Wallace County District Court on January 25, 2019 with attorney Christopher Rohr, Colby, in the matter of case number 2018 TR 282 - count 1 Driving While License Suspended, a level B non-person misdemeanor, date of offense, October 13, 2018. Whitaker... [More]
The Sharon Springs Wildcats started their football season this past Friday night at home against the St. Francis Indians. The team this year is a young one with 14 player, with only 4 seniors. They also have a new coaching staff so we will be looking for a lot of growth throughout... [More]
On Saturday, September 4, 2019, eleven golfers participated in a Par 3 Tournament. Every hole was shortened to Par 3 range, with 80 yards for the shortest hole and 180 yards for the longest hole. Generous donations from sponsors provided 9 flag prizes, all for closest... [More]
Dixieland jazz and razzmatazz is coming to the Goodland High School Auditorium, Sunday, Sept. 15 at 2 p.m. MDT (3 p.m. CDT). Sponsored by the Western Plains Arts Association, admission is by WPAA season ticket or adults $20, students $10, at the door. The second of... [More]
Card Shower for Harold Deines
Jeff and Beth Vincent wish to welcome into their family 2 new grandchildren. Beth’s daughter Ashley and Austin Falkerson of Mayetta, Kans had a baby boy, Westley Amil, born May 31, 2019. Jeff’s daughter Kalynn and Klay Johnson of Elkhart, Kans had a baby... [More]
Peonies are one of the easiest perennials to grow, and unlike some perennials, remain attractive even when they are not blooming. They thrive a wide range of conditions and require little maintenance once they are well established. Peonies do not transplant well, but if you... [More]
Christal (Chris) Vincent Bohrer, (late) Gregory L. Bohrer, (uncle) Mike Vincent and Dan & Robin (Siruta) Rogge and brothers Clint (Julia) Rogge, Clay Rogge & Coleton Rogge would like to announce the marriage of Rusty L. Bohrer to Shayna D Rogge on September 7th, 2019... [More]
Mark your calendars for September 21 when the Prairie Museum will host the second annual “Past to Present” event featuring demonstrations of traditional and contemporary skills from 10:00 AM to 4:00 PM. “We have several returning artisans from last year,”... [More]
In mid-August of 1869, Fort Wallace found itself in a time of transition. Some of the more immediate dangers from Indian attacks had receded, but other obstacles such as disease, and the elements still created great challenges. The building of the Kansas Pacific Railway was still... [More]
Here at the Fort Wallace Museum, we are gearing up for the “Trails to Rails” 2019 Summer Exposition, coming at us on Fri-Sun July 12-14, 2019. Once again, collaboration is the name of the game - this time, we will tell the story of the climax of stagecoach travel... [More]
We are excited about the upcoming Summer Exposition “Trails to Rails,” which highlights the year 1869, when the Kansas Pacific Railway arrived in Wallace County and the era of stagecoach travel came to an end. In addition to our own local and regional talent, the... [More]
Stage coaches will once again travel the Smoky Hill Trail as the Butterfield Trail Museum at Russell Springs and the Fort Wallace Museum at Wallace join forces for “Trails to Rails,” July 12-14. The weekend’s activities will celebrate the arrival of the railroad... [More]
The Memorial Association and the Guardians of Fort Wallace are excited about the upcoming summer exposition “Trails to Rails,” which will recognize the “last hurrah” of the stagecoach era and the arrival of the Kansas Pacific Railway in Logan and Wallace... [More]
Another Fort Wallace Rodeo is in the books! We had a very large crowd on Saturday, as well as a full slate of contestants for every event. A special dedication was held at the beginning of the rodeo honoring long-time Memorial Association member Ernie Poe, featuring Ernie’s... [More]
Here comes Memorial Day Weekend, and with it, the Fort Wallace Rodeo! As usual, there will be two rodeo performances - Saturday, May 25th at 7 pm MDT and again on Sunday, May 26th at 2 pm MDT. Admission prices are: Adults $10, Kids 6-12 $5, and under 6 free. As an added feature,... [More]
To the hundreds of folks who visited the Fort Wallace Museum during this past weekend’s BKRT, we say… Thank you! To our wonderful staff - Tony, Patty Lou, Ramona and Deb, we say…Thank you! To our incredibly hard-working board members, we say…... [More]
©2019 The Western Times. Powered by Pixel Power Haus.